grief is fickle beast.

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grief is fickle beast.

both frail and resilient,

she is messy, disorderly, and unkempt.

she refuses to sit quietly and

doesn’t keep to a schedule. 

she craves the thrill of the roller coaster ride,

and loses control on a whim.

she has no timeline and needs no explanation. 

grief carries a pain that cannot be spoken

and has no mercy.

she is like the mighty ocean, coming in waves, 

sometimes calm, frequently intense.

 

we are encompassed by the sadness she brings, 

often require closure,

or simply try to push through.

but grief is not something we ever finish or complete,

and the journey is different for each who encounters her fickle ways. 

 

Grief is complex –

she is as individual as a fingerprint, yet as common as the flu.

she will be different with you than she may be with mi.

she requires time, effort, energy and cannot be rushed. 

often we feel alone, isolated,

abandoned, and in pain, 

inconsolable, 

surrounded with nothing to cling to but memories and mementos.

 

yes, grief is a fickle beast.

because once she has echoed through every chamber of our heart

and trampled through every emotion,

once she has done all that she can do, 

she reveals to us 

that she is simply love… with no escape.

she is a love unfinished, 

a love left lingering with weighted memories.

 

she brings to us a loss so immeasurable, 

that all that remains is the love left behind.

she is there with us,

consuming every ounce of our existence,

commanding patience and understanding,

time and grace,

mercy and acceptance.

and so, we come to realize that grief, in all her malice, 

is really love in disguise,

depicted as the love that escapes from the corner of our eyes, 

the lump in our throats, 

the hollow in our hearts.

she is our love. 

the love that we want to give but can no longer,

the love that has no place to go.

 

and so, as the sun rises and sets endless times,

we manage to heal and rebuild,

to gain the strength to stand tall. 

we take the emptiness and 

slowly move forward, remaking our life, 

breathing hope back into our hearts,

clinging to the memories and mementos.

 

and as we push onward,

it is that grief, 

that love,

that guide us hand in hand, 

so we shall not walk the journey alone.

© c. michelle bryant griffin

Photo by: focus on fabulous creative photography

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