if you wanted to, you would


The other day I heard the statement, “If they wanted to, they would.” I found myself playing with different scenarios like if we “wanted to lose weight, we would. If we wanted to make more money, we would. If we wanted to have a better relationship, and a better life, we would. If the kids wanted to call or visit, they would. You can fill in the blank with whatever you’d like. This message truly got mi thinking, and wondering about my own “efforts” in my life and it occurred to mi that as harsh as this statement might be, I find it to be quite accurate.

And yet often, we don’t lose weight. We don’t call regularly. We seem to settle or accept the status quo as “just the way it is.” We make excuses or perhaps we lack the confidence or willpower to accomplish the things we wish we could.

As harsh as it may be, as accurate or debatable as it might be it is a lesson, I learned a bit late in my life. I now know that I am in charge of my life, my destiny, and my happiness. I cannot and should not rely on others for those things. It’s not my parent’s fault, my husband’s fault, my hormone’s fault, etc. Those may be obstacles that affect mi but only I can choose to allow them to hinder mi.

I realized that unless I do something this time in my life is as good as it will ever get. I encourage you to ask yourself, “Am I okay with that?” If you’re happy and have everything aligned as you’d like in your life, then this message isn’t for you. But if you’re making excuses or passing blame, I encourage you to do some soul-searching. Is whatever you’re avoiding something you really want? It’s okay if it’s not. Perhaps you’ve outgrown that need or want. Perhaps life circumstances have changed. But at least you will know and hopefully, stop beating yourself up for not doing it.

But, if it is something you want, then why are you not doing it? Expectations can often become the thief of dreams. Your playing small doesn’t serve the world and dulls your light. If you focus on obstacles, all you will see are obstacles. If you focus on the path, then you will see the path. Ultimately, it is your choice. If you really wanted to, you would.

© c. michelle bryant griffin
Photo by Mariana Montrazi: www.pexels.com

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